For two years, I had pelvic pain in the left piriformis area that radiated towards my thigh. The pain was so severe that I couldn't continue working and I went on sick leave.
It all started from a motion with my leg while pushing against a weight, that caused a loud "crack" that reverberated through my body. My first response was fear and "Oh no, what did I do to myself?!?!"
Gradually, I started experiencing pain that made me want to investigate what was happening in my body as a result of that "crack".
I visited an endless line of doctors and therapists (acupuncture, osteopathy, massage, energy healing, hyperbaric oxygen therapy, physical therapy, shiatsu, and chiropractics) until I reached a family physician, Dr. Amir Tzivoni, who treats TMS with a mind-body method. He recommended going to Lihi Lisser, a therapist who experienced pain that was similar to mine and was able to recover using this method.
This understanding took a long time and during this period I flooded my mind with materials of all kinds on the subject to convince myself that this was my situation.
Today, after the treatment, the pelvic pain is still present in my life, but at a low level that allows me to go on with my life without focusing on nothing else.
I went back to being the active, fully functional woman I was, and to engaging in sports. I also had pain in other areas that disappeared completely.
If the pain overwhelms me sometimes, it makes me stop for a minute and think why it is so strong right now; am I stressed out about something or tense because of something in my body? Maybe I'm not breathing correctly? Even if there is no change in that moment, I know how to tell myself that there will be better days, and I'm sure that eventually, the pain will fade, even if it's very slow. Sometimes I look back at the process I went through and see how much progress I've made and am very proud of myself.
What helped me heal was understanding my patterns of behavior and their connection to the pain. For example, understanding how certain social situations are difficult for me, like if someone takes up a lot of space or ignores me, are triggers that make me feel worthless, that I'm not being seen or that I don't count, that I'm worth less than others.
I saw the connection between these feelings and the pain that increases in those moments. Most importantly, I learned how I can support myself in those situations — to remind myself that I am good and worthy just as I am and at the same time hold space for the other person and their own difficulties, with the understanding that this doesn't take up my own space. Today, I prepare myself ahead of social situations like these and it's no longer a trigger for me the way it was in the past and does not increase my pain.
I learned many new things about myself during therapy. For example, that I can hold space for myself without guilt, and that I am very strong emotionally. I can be much more supportive of myself and not put myself down even if I don't say something that is the epitome of wisdom. I discovered that I can really reinvent myself. Today I relate differently to my emotional world. I learned to feel my feelings and be with them. Now I know how to be a better friend to myself, to comfort myself in times of difficulty and be there for myself without abandoning myself every time I feel worthless or "less than" other people.
As a result of the therapy, I let myself be me!
